Public Access Issue - Three words that can cause anxiety for any service dog handler. We talk about it. You accept that at some point in your life, you will have an access issue, and yet, each time you go out in public, you pray that it never happens. Read below to learn about my first public access issue. ConfidentI researched ADA law thoroughly. My boyfriend and I acted out public access issue scenarios, to practice me remaining calm and standing up for my rights. I watched public access issue videos on YouTube to see what other people did. I read problem stories online and talked to people who had been denied access in the past, and took note of how they handled it. I told myself over and over again that should I be denied, I would remain calm, state my rights, hand out ADA service dog info cards, and stand my ground. I was confident that I could handle any situation that came my way. The day Robbie & I encountered our first access issue, I was confident walking into the restaurant. My boyfriend’s mother & I were out running errands and wanted to get lunch in town. We stopped at La Hacienda in Boonville, MO. Being a Mexican restaurant, I anticipated that there may be a problem with admittance, so I grabbed a few of my service dog law cards just in case. I walked into the restaurant with head held high, and acted as if there was nothing unusual going on. The waiter greeted us and prepared to seat us, but stopped when he saw Robbie. Immediately he three his hands up the air and said, “no no no no.” I tried to calmly explain that Robbie is a service dog and that by federal law, I cannot be denied access. He wouldn’t listen. He called his manager over, and the manager too, started yelling. Anxious/FuriousCue a weird mix of anxiety and fury. It's hard enough being disabled without people drawing attention to you and using your disability/need for a service dog as a way to tell you where you are allowed to go. I could feel my hands shaking and my heart racing. Robbie was sitting beside me quietly, and he leaned against my leg to try to calm me. I took a deep breath and tried to hand the manager one of my cards, but he refused to take it. I explained the facts over and over again, just as I had practiced, but nothing worked. They didn’t want to hear me out. The manager told me that no dogs were allowed because it would disturb the other customers. He added that that included service dogs. I realized that there was no point in arguing with him because he was never going to understand. The other customers were beginning to stare at me. My anxiety was quickly getting out of control, so I merely replied, “You are breaking federal law by denying me access. You just lost some business.” And we left. It took all I had not to break down into tears. Robbie licked my hands and let my quaking hands pet him until I was calm again. I wanted to be furious and wrathful, but mostly I was just humiliated. It’s a terrible feeling, being discriminated against like that. SupportedWhen I took my story online to a service dog support group, everyone immediately extended condolences. They were all very supportive and angry at what had happened to me. My friends and family were equally furious and supportive. When I told my boyfriend about it later, he said that he was proud of me for remaining calm and not getting combative. It was great to know that I had people ready to stand up with me. BulliedThe support quickly took a turn for the worst though. My family and friends never faltered, but the service dog group began to bully me into filing a report. I wanted to put the whole thing behind me. I didn’t get anyone’s names, and thinking about the incident only triggered anxiety attacks for me, even days later. When I made the mistake of telling the group that I would not be cooing to the police or filing a DOJ report, they got angry with me. I tried to explain that it was too stressful for me, and that cops in our town know absolutely nothing about service dogs, but they wouldn’t listen. They told me that I was a bad service dog handler for not reporting it because it is the inherent duty of all service dog handlers to file reports each time something happens in order to protect the rights of future handlers. I understand the importance of advocacy, but we are the only service dog team in our area, and I don’t agree with the notion that I am personally responsible for upholding the law for every single team out there. That is ton of pressure to put on one team. Eventually, I stopped talking about the incident on that group page. ChoiceI did not see the need to stomp my feet, call the media, and raise all hell over a Mexican restaurant denying me access. Yes, I could have called the cops, but all the cops can do is get me seated. After that, there would be no assurance that we would be treated with respect. Had it been a grocery store or a doctor’s office, I would have called the cops, filed a DOJ report, and covered social media sites with my story. But one Mexican restaurant in a po-dunk Missouri town just didn’t seem worth it. After an access issue, you will always have 2 choices: 1) You can stomp your feet, file a DOJ report, and enact change or 2) You can evaluate what you did wrong and come up with things to do next time I chose option number two. My boyfriend & I did go visit the local police and sheriff’s offices to introduce ourselves and share information about service dog law, but as we suspected, they knew very little about service dog teams. We even overheard one of the police officers say, with a laugh, “Can’t they just go somewhere else?” That’s the level of support we would have gotten had we called the police. Looking back, I handled it the best way that I possibly could given the situation. Advice for Others
Good Luck to future teams - I hope my story can help you!
2 Comments
Eleanor
2/20/2016 04:25:22 pm
This is a great post; I'm sure it will be helpful to other people! Hopefully writing it was cathartic in a way.
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3/7/2016 08:34:02 pm
Yes, it was very helpful to write it all out. It made me a little anxious to write it, but getting it down was the right choice. And I hope that my story can help someone else with their public access issues or fears.
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My Name is Sally...I have a condition called Complex Regional Pain Syndrome. This blog is about my journey training Robbie, a dog who helped me regain independence, confidence, and achieve the impossible in the face of my disability. It continues on with the training of Austin, Robbie's successor. Check Out... - "More than a Dog" was published on a site called The Mighty Categories
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